Maimstream I

Maimstream I Sept 20, 2021 1:26:10 GMT

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Post by CCWrestling on Sept 20, 2021 1:26:10 GMT

[ SEASON ONE, EPISODE ONE ]

That's how we would have opened.

Instead, we open with Corey Maim in his office, which seemed to just be a bathroom he’d pulled a desk into. He’s typing on an old IBM computer, trying to get it to work but seemingly gets frustrated. Dove Van Damme, Austyn May, Prudence, Stephie Rayge, and a few others from the Maimstream production staff stop by and tell Corey the shows about ready to start. He says in a minute and keeps bopping the IBM trying to get it to work. Austyn asks why his office is a bathroom and Corey starts to answer before Dove just says don’t ask and we immediately go into the opening for the show.

“Hug You Hardcore” by Lordi plays over the intro package for tonight’s program, featuring several of the signed talents announced so far such as Matt ‘Deathrow’ King, Santana Johnson, Kowloon Zombie, Tommy Knox, and more! The credits play for a bit before we go to ringside where Corey Weldman and Andrew McAllister run through the program ahead of them and what a show tonight! The Splatterpunk Championship would be on the line as Kowloon Zombie and Tommy Knox rekindle their rivalry, and we see some sort of cinematic ‘horror fuckery’ as many professional wrestlers descend on Corey Maims house to find his jar of you don’t even want to know! The Gore Whore and Ultraviolent Championships are on the line and much much more!

We immediately end up at ringside where Andrew McAllister and Corey Weldman are ready to introduce the next match.

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "Here we are about to embark on the first match in Maimstream history! What a show we're about to have, Corey!"

COREY WELDMAN: "As part of the Deathmatch Coreys, Corey Maim and myself always dreamed of having a company like this. Now, this small upstart company is a reality and we cannot wait to see who is involved here tonight, Andrew!"

The entrances of several wrestlers occurs in the background, we see Anne-Archy and Cleo Wyatt enter together, Blaise with his manager Austen Tate, the monstrous Axel, Camila Vaine, the devil Conor Mayfair, the Weavers (reigning CCW Couples Champions, actually!), Rhett Davenport with his manager Caroline Pierce, Rose Mankiller, Simon Katch, Stabitha! We were getting them all! A disgusted Teddy Levandrier accompanied his client, Iris King to the ringside area, both of them hesitant to enter. Meanwhile Luke Jones, Stu, Paul Mall, and Kaz Bonham made it to the ring... Dash Dawkins was on the stage hesitating to come to the ring after a recent fight in CCW with Corey Maim... Hardcore icon Taylor Lynn would make it to the ring, Zapp Kavanaugh would soon enter as well, then Thalia Starks would appear before we cap off with the bizarre Killer Karen came to the ring as the very last entrant.

AUSTYN MAY: "The following is the Clusterfuck Battle Royal where the final two will do battle for the Ultraviolent Championship!"

Austyn seemed to hesitate at the words 'clusterfuck', covering her mouth, making her talk dirty, bad! At ringside, as everyone either entered the ring or studied for their gameplan, Anne-Archy would find her way to the announce table and plant herself firmly on Andrew McAllisters lap.

COREY WELDMAN: "It seems we're being joined by your significant other, Andrew!"

ANNE-ARCHY: "Ew what's poking me?!"

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "... Isn't she something?"

Andrew rolled his eyes as we hear the bell begin to ring.

*Final two will face off for the Ultraviolent Championship
22 Participants: Anne-Archy, Blaise, Axel, Camila Vaine, Conor Mayfair, Cleo Wyatt, Noah and Lola Weaver, Rhett Davenport, Rose Mankiller, Simon Katch, Stabitha, Iris King, Stu, Luke Jones, Paul Mall, Taylor Lynn, Zapp Kavanaugh, Dash Dawkins, Thalia Starks, Kaz Bonham, Killer Karen..

Before the match had even begun, Dash Dawkins witnessed glass panes being brought to ringside and ultimately waved it off and hopped over the top rope, effectively eliminating himself. Conor Mayfair and Simon Katch were having some back and forth strikes in one corner and Katch would soon find himself thrown from the ring. As Conor celebrated the elimination, Stu, Paul Mall, Luke Jones and Kaz Bonham would slip up behind Conor and launch him out!

Rose Mankiller had brought a barbed wire bat into the ring and went for Noah Weaver! Lola tackles her to the mat and Rose drops the bat, Luke Jokes goes for it only to eat a big boot from Taylor Lynn! Lynn grabs Luke up and tosses him from the ring then acquires the bat herself! Paul Mall went for Lynn only to eat a barbed wire bat for his troubles! Lynn then launches Paul out of the ring and smirks as Paul lays bleeding on the outside.

Zapp Kavanaugh is in the corner hammering away at Thalia Starks, Camila Vaine slips up behind him and dropkicks him! He's laying on the ropes and Vaine bounces off the ropes and leaping kicks him clean out of the ring! Back across the ring, Noah and Lola Weaver hoist Stabitha up into the air in a powerbomb position and LITERALLY toss her out of the ring through a table set up at ringside!

The CCW Couples Champions turn their attention back around the ring to whomever remains, surveying the landscape. Rhett Davenport and Axel, two of the mixed martial artist types in the match are slugging it out. The big men going blow for blow, Axel has Rhett on the ropes and goes for a clothesline. As both big men are tangled in the ropes, Stu and Kaz come up behind them and somehow finesse both over the ropes!

During the chaos, a pissed off Axel drags Stu out of the ring under the ropes, not eliminating him and proceeds to slam him back first into the ring post repeatedly. Then he goes to get a chair and warps him once, Kaz gets out of the ring and goes to fight the big man off as Maimstreams referees (some old fat guys they hired) try to break it up. Kaz grabs a toolbox from ringside and slings it at Axel as they exchange words before she tries to help Stu back in the ring.

They finally get Axel out of the arena and during the chaos, Thalia Starks eliminates Noah Weaver! If looks could kill, Lola was giving Thalia one. The two begin to exchange blows as nearby, Blaise is cheered on by Austen Tate as he tries to take advantage of the injury of Stu! He's stomping away only for Kaz Bonham to pull him off, he strikes Kaz with several punches, backing Kaz up to the ropes. He goes for a spinning kick of some kind and Kaz ducks and dumps him over the top!

Taylor Lynn sneaks up behind Kaz who's taunting Blaise for attacking her friend! Taylor takes her by the tights and launches her out of the ring! Taylor smirks and taunts Kaz who is none too happy with the elimination. Before Taylor can make much of a move though, Thalia Starks tackles her to the mat. Kaz is on the outside searching for something and she hands a light tube to Stu! Stu raises up, having been down most of the match and stalks his prey! He cracks Thalia over the head with the tube, bursting it right there as she crumbles to the mat!

He works to hoist Thalia up and throw her out of the ring but Lola Weaver comes up behind and tries to put both out! Stu manages to hold on but Thalia is none too lucky as Lola catches her with a well placed boot and sends her to the floor! Stu retreats to a corner, few remain in the match as Rose Mankiller runs in to try to put Lola out but she hangs on! Killer Karen has Taylor Lynn in the corner using some sort of mandible claw trying to choke her out, but Taylor starts fighting back!

Karen backs off, covering up. She manages to jab Taylor in the gut and comes off the ropes, but Taylor back body drops her clean out of the ring and into some barbed wire boards! Razor wire cutting into Karens skin but the deranged Karen seems to like it as the crowd gawks in horror. Rose Mankiller slips up on Taylor who's enjoying her sudden elimination of Karen and hurls her over the ropes! Taylor hangs on and Mankiller hits a running dropkick!

What an upset! Mankiller overcomes a hardcore icon and this was not lost on Taylor Lynn who immediately grabs a lead pipe from ringside and re-enters the ring! The referees protest as she begins pelting Mankiller with it, and soon, she hoists Mankiller up and throws her out regardless! The referees try to once again maintain order as Mankiller ducks a swipe with the pipe and the two fight off into the crowd once Lynn is clotheslined over by Mankiller!

Stu, Cleo Wyatt, Lola Weaver, and Camila Vaine remain! Lola immediately goes for Stu who drops her with a drop toe hold for the moment, while Wyatt and Vaine fight. Stu picks his spot when he sees Cleo in a corner while the flexible Camila has her in some sort of limber... boot to the throat... stretchy thing. There's a word for it, we don't know it here. Stu goes in to assist, making friends where he can, they work to toss Cleo out of the ring which infuriates Wyatt!

Stu proves quickly to be not much of a friend at least to the stranger though, trying to put Camila out who drops to the apron and clings to the ropes. Lola Weaver is getting back up after eating a nasty drop toe hold that took her out briefly. Lola is on the ropes eating chops to the chest from Stu! Lola ducks and bounces off the ropes but Vaine leaps up and catches her in a head scissors! She then pulls Lola over the top rope!

WAIT A MINUTE! As Camila is celebrating making it to the next part of the match, we'd forgotten! Anne-Archy had went to the commentary desk and never entered the match! Anne hits the ring as Camila celebrates while looking to the crowd! Anne-Archy launches Camila over the rope! The final two - Stu and Anne-Archy!

ELIMINATIONS: Iris King (never entered the match.) 1. Dash Dawkins (eliminated by himself.) 2. Simon Katch (eliminated by Conor Mayfair). 3. Conor Mayfair (eliminated by Stu, Kaz, Paul and Luke) 4. Luke Jones (eliminated by Taylor Lynn) 5. Paul Mall (eliminated by Taylor Lynn) 6. Zapp Kavanaugh (eliminated by Camila Vaine) 7. Stabitha (eliminated by Lola and Noah Weaver) 8. Rhett Davenport (eliminated by Stu and Kaz) 9. Axel (eliminated by Stu and Kaz) 10. Noah Weaver (eliminated by Thalia Starks) 11. Blaise (eliminated by Kaz Bonham) 12. Kaz Bonham (eliminated by Taylor Lynn) 12. Thalia Starks (eliminated by Lola Weaver) 13. Killer Karen (eliminated by Taylor Lynn) 14. Taylor Lynn (eliminated by Rose Mankiller) 15. Rose Mankiller (eliminated illegally by Taylor Lynn) 16. Cleo Wyatt (eliminated by Camila Vaine) 17. Lola Weaver (eliminated by Camila Vaine) 18. Camila Vaine (eliminated by Anne-Archy)
FINAL TWO: Stu and Anne-Archy.

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "Crafty play by Anne here, she spent the enter time here with us, waiting for her moment to strike."

COREY WELDMAN: "There were times I thought she'd run into the ring, like when her friend Cleo Wyatt was eliminated, but she stuck to it and waited for the appropriate time. Smart, devious, but smart."

We see Stephie Rayge backstage looking to catch various people from the clusterfuck, all smiles as some of them turn down her attempts to get a word.

STEPHIE RAYGE: "We're looking to get some reactions from some of the losing members of that match but... Wait, something's happening!"

We see Rose Mankiller and Taylor Lynn still fighting with a sudden slam as she launched Taylor into some pipes! Taylor Lynn out of nowhere brandishes a knife that had fallen in the ensuing chaos and STABS Rose Mankiller!

STEPHIE RAYGE: "Yes! Stab eachother, get this all on camera, this will be my big break. I'm standing here live as these two crazy bitches try to kill eachother."

Stephie was into this reporter schtick as the tough as nails Mankiller yanked the knife from herself and stabbed Taylor back! That's not safe! None of this is safe! Out of nowhere, the woman known as Stabitha runs up and yanks the knife from Taylor.

STABITHA: "No, this is how you do it!"

Then begins stabbing herself and cackling while Rose and Taylor just stop, holding their wounds and back away.

TAYLOR LYNN: "Next time, cunt.."

ROSE MANKILLER: "Yeah, you're gonna get your ass beat."

Stabitha was on the ground stabbing herself, moaning in sheer pleasure as Stephie gawked in disgust.

STABITHA: "We're all just meat, don't you want my meat? Ahahahahah."

STEPHIE RAYGE: "Yep, it's weird now."

She turned and walked away while we watched Stabitha continue to pleasure herself in odd ways with a knife on the floor.

COREY WELDMAN: "Well that was super weird."

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "Weird enough. Lets not talk about it, lets hope poor sweet Stephie can unsee it."

AUSTYN MAY: "The following match is for the Ultraviolent Championship which will be competed for under Maimstream Rules, meaning you can do whatever it takes to incapacitate your opponent for the three count."

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "She's not bad at this."

COREY WELDMAN: "She comes from a long line of promo guys, you know her sister Essence? Big promo guy."

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "Oh I know. Big muscles too, can't find a shirt that fits her."

COREY WELDMAN: "Runs in the family."

Stu vs. Anne-Archy w/ Cleo Wyatt
Ultraviolent Championship
Maimstream Rules

We're back in the ring as Anne-Archy and Stu set up for their match. Anne immediately goes in with some punches to Stu's stomach, the former underground fighter (apparently) nailing some good hits on a weakened Stu who is clearly tired. Stu eventually turns it around, backing her out of the corner and starts slugging away at her! Stu has her on the ropes! Stu hits his finisher and goes for the pin! The referee counts it! Cleo pulls the referee out of the ring!

Kaz Bonham appears back at ringside and tackles Cleo into the crowd! The building is in chaos as Stu glances out to see his friend fighting off with Anne's ally. Back in the ring, Anne has a can of some kind of spray... Stu turns around and Anne strikes a match in front of the spray, and shoots Stu in the eyes with it like a flamethrower! Anne hits her finishing move, hooks the leg... 1... 2.. 3! WE HAVE A ULTRAVIOLENT CHAMPION IN ANNE-ARCHY!

WINNER: Anne-Archy

Stu is seen outside with Luke Jones and Paul Mall who are trying to check on him as he holds his face. Anne celebrates in the ring with the Ultraviolent Championship, a championship she has literally stolen on this night!

We go to the back where Corey Maim is still dealing with the repurcussions of the great hacking incident that had almost derailed the show.

DOVE VAN DAMME: "Corey, you better fucking pay me. Your check hasn't cleared and so far I'm only doing this whole General Manager thing because of a favor. Do not screw this up or I won't present the winner of the main event with the championship like we had planned..."

Dove stormed off as Corey sat on the toilet in front of his computer and looked sad, then he glanced up as Austyn May wandered in.

COREY MAIM: "What do I do Austyn, you're smart?"

AUSTYN MAY: "Better make some calls, we all did this because we like wrestling but... also having work is nice."

COREY MAIM: "I get that, but they took everything. I can't even get in my Facebook account."

AUSTYN MAY: "It's just fighting on there anyway."

COREY MAIM: "And on social media, that god damned Action Wrestling always touting their roster.. the Maimstream chat room is just some guy insulting people!

AUSTYN MAY: "They left that?"

COREY MAIM: "What?'

AUSTYN MAY: "It seems weird they'd leave one of your accounts on a platform."

COREY MAIM: "I'm not some computer wizard, Austyn. I don't know how it works, I don't know how any of this works."

Dove Van Damme poked her head back in the room, still disgusted at her bosses office being a bathroom.

DOVE VAN DAMME: "I heard all of that, you're faking, that check better clear!"

Dove wandered off as Austyn looked on and grinned, patting Corey on the back and then heading off to continue ring announcing.

Prudence is in the back with a microphone ready to interview Teddy Levandrier who is with his client, Iris King, the current CCW Golden Ticket Champion.

PRUDENCE: "Iris, Teddy, why would you walk out of that battle royal earlier tonight? Iris you never even made it in the ring."

Iris took the microphone from her and held it up for a moment.

IRIS KING: "Tell her."

TEDDY LEVANDRIER: "Ehem, my name is Theodore Levandrier and I am the representation for the finest specimen in all of wrestling. The one true King, Iris King. Both Iris King and myself had certain promises made for a thoroughbred athlete like her to join this company... and what we saw was sheer chaos around the ring. Iris King is a refined athlete, not some barbarian. Iris King /will/ compete in Maimstream, but under her rules. Not Maimstreams."

IRIS KING: "The Kings rules."

TEDDY LEVANDRIER: "Exactly."

Teddy would head off with Iris, the two discussing things as Prudence looked on and then sent things back to the ring.

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "This is a big one, lad. The Gore Whore Championship featuring three of the best women this company has to offer."

COREY WELDMAN: "None of them are shy to success either. Heather Haze has been a standout in CCW, where as Bambi is the reigning Divine Champion, and then you have Brea Lombardi who has seen her own share of success all over the world. Now they all come together to see who can be Gore Whore Champion!"

Heather Haze vs. Bambi vs. Brea Lombardi
Gore Whore Championship

Elimination Style Match - Maimstream Rules

The bell rang as each woman hopped out of the ring and went for a weapon... but wait a minute, somethings happening at ringside! A woman is attacking Heather Haze from the crowd! She's tied something around her neck and is choking her! The woman hops the barricade! Wendy Wynne! Heather Hazes rival for the CCW Television Championship! Wynne slams Haze into the steps and then into the barricade! Wynne grabs Haze and hoists her up, powerbombing her through a table!

Wynne celebrates with the Television Championship as Brea Lombardi cautiously approaches, then Wynne backs up the stage... Lombardi immediately covers Haze. 1... 2... KICKOUT! Lombardi is shocked as she gets Haze up and throws her into the ring. Haze is hurting as Wynne watches, eventually joining commentary. Bambi hits the ring as Lombardi assaults Haze with a pipe (not her first time being assaulted with a pipe)! Bambi rolls her up and hooks the tights! But Lombardi kicks out!

The back and forth continued on for some time with Lombardi getting a second wind and attacking Bambi, cornering her and choking her with a well placed boot to the throat. With Bambi briefly down, Lombardi goes on the outside and brings in a electric guitar. Lombardi enters the ring and is setting Bambi up, but Bambi swiftly ducks the shot with the guitar and drop toe holds Lombardi to the mat!

Haze is back up and hits her finish on Bambi but she's seeing red, a redhead to be exact! Haze grabs the guitar and stalks Lombardi, waiting for her to get up and then cracks it clean over her head! Haze miraculously hooks Lombardi's leg!

BREA LOMBARDI IS ELIMINATED!

Bambi is back up and Haze is clearly weakened from the earlier attack by Wendy Wynne, but both of them clearly want the gold. The two exchange words, then forearms! Both women having no give up! Bambi slips around Haze and whips her off the ropes, Haze comes off with a spinning heel kick and takes Bambi down! Haze decides she's gonna do Wendys earlier move but better and heads outside to get a table.

She drags it back into the ring but it being wrapped in various forms of barbed wire and razor wire makes it difficult. After struggling for a bit, Haze gets it into the ring and sets it up. She then pulls Bambi up who strikes her a few times, only for Haze to catch her with a knee to the gut and begin to try to lift her up onto the turnbuckle. Bambi ends up up there, seated, and Haze is glancing back up the stage at Wendy to show her what she can do.

Bambi out of nowhere shoves Haze off the top rope and through the barbed wire covered table! Haze is grimacing in pain as the barbed wire cuts into her and she tries to roll off the table. But Bambi is still on the top rope and grimaces herself, before doing a Slit Split right down on top of her, risking her own injury in the barbed wire mess in the process! Bambi manages to extend an arm in the barbed wire mess and covers her! The referee counts the three and we have our champion!

WINNER: Bambi

After the match as Bambi is presented the belt, having been removed from some of the barbed wire which had left cuts on her legs from the Slit Split... Wendy Wynne hits the ring and begins to attack the fallen Heather Haze. The CCW Divine Champion sees this, and being the face she is, immediately leaps up and hits her Diving Hurricanrana, the Coital Climax on Wendy and launches her out of the ring! Nobody was taking this moment from Bambi!

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "Bambi not letting Wendy take her moment away from her!"

COREY WELDMAN: "And you see Heather Haze bowing out of the ring, she fought valiantly, surviving an earlier attack from Wendy to get into this thing. We'll definitely see more of them over on CCW for sure."

Bambi holds up the Gore Whore Championship and the CCW Divine Championship, celebrating as the crowd chants for 'Bambi Two Belts' to end the segment.

We go back to the backstage area where Corey Maim is still dealing with the hacking incident. His print keeps printing pages with odd words on them.

COREY MAIM: "Stephie, you're tech savvy. I think my printer has been hacked by the devil too."

STEPHIE RAYGE: "... I'm kind of busy hunting down my next interview. What's happened, Corey?"

COREY MAIM: "Okay, it keeps printing out some sort of Latin or something. Satan is among us. He knows that jar isn't real mayo."

STEPHIE RAYGE: "..."

COREY MAIM: "I made it because of you. And Dove. And Austyn. And Pru. And Bambi."

STEPHIE RAYGE: "Please stop telling me this."

COREY MAIM: "Also it was a jar I just found. But anyway help me."

STEPHIE RAYGE: "No. You grossed me out, you get to deal with this."

COREY MAIM: "BUT I'VE BEEN HACKED! Someone named lorem and ipsem are coming for me!"

Corey proclaims to the Heavens, dropping to his knees as Jacob Kuntz walks out of a nearby urinal.

COREY MAIM: "Kuntz... how long have you been here? And do you know how to stop a printer that is possessed by the devil - caused by hackers?"

JACOB KUNTZ: "Sweet little Corey, I've always been here. You made that mayo because of me."

COREY MAIM: "... Hot."

JACOB KUNTZ: "Yes."

Their awkward exchange and staredown continued before Kuntz wandered off. He hadn't even zipped up his fly, weird.

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "Strange guy, our boss."

COREY WELDMAN: "But remember - hacking is no joke. If you feel you've been exposed to some sort of internet crime or are the victim. Please contact the Internet Crime Complain Center at IC3.gov."

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "That's IC3.gov. Together, we can stop professional wrestling hackings. Please stop Knox's reign of terror."

AUSTYN MAY: "The following contest is for the Gorehounds Tag Team Championships and will also be contested under Maimstream Rules!"

The Sky Sorcerers (Jayden Beckett and Jenz Jameson) vs. Dot and Mariah Kennedy vs. I.E.D. (Eleanor Dhampir and Victoria Marvell) vs. Reesemart (Christmas Reese and Ethan Giles)
Gorehounds Championships
Maimstream Rules

This one was chaotic from the get go with all four teams having it out for one another! Dot and Mariah would seemingly make targets of IED early on, while Reesemart and the Sky Sorcerers did battle. Reesemart (the tandem of Giles and Reese) would quickly begin to dominate early on with their tandem offense. These two were a well oiled machine and looked to take control of the match at the start and so far into it. IED would show some resilience, though, managing to score a near fall on Reese before having it broken up by Beckett.

The youngest men in the match, the Sky Sorcerers would eventually take the lead, literally rolling through members of the match with dropkicks and high flying offense until they were the last men standing. The crowd was loving these kids, but at one point when Jayden Beckett hit the top rope, Christmas Reese would push him off into several ladders lying outside of the ring. Once he crashed into these, this left Jenz at a severe disadvantage. Of course, Reese was eating up the boos from his misdeeds as well!

Jenz fought valiantly from here, singled out quite literally as referees checked on Jayden on the outside who favored his leg, having landed awkwardly on several ladders. Mariah and Dot hit the outside and attack him anyway, further injuring him as Mariah tried to put him over her knee and spank him for some reason. Weird. She got some swats in before referees began to help Jayden to the back! Jenz is hanging on in the ring when Reese and Giles hit a tandem finisher on him onto a steel chair and takes him out!

IED and Reesemart are going at it in the ring, Jenz is out on the side of the ring, while Mariah and Dot play it safe and choose their spots carefully. Reesemart and IED are going at it, Victoria takes out Giles while Eleanor handles Reese in the corner, choking him with a boot! Reese rolls out of the ring and tries to escape, Giles regroups with him, but IED are on their trail! Reese hands Giles a mop and bucket and says mop the floor with them!

Giles goes fuckin crazy out of fear of Reese and attacks them with a bucket! What the fuck? The crowd are booing loudly as Reese keeps yelling for him to kill them with the bucket for some reason, not sure how he'd do that. Finally, Mariah Kennedy and Dot go on the assault! They catch Reese from behind with an attack and while Giles is busy hitting Victoria with a mop, Mariah launches him into a ringpost! They drag QT back into the ring who begs them off, only for Dot to drive him into the mat with her finisher! Mariah and Dot both pile on him but the pin his broken up by IED!

Reese crawls to safety, where Ethan consoles him with a hug, then Reese gets mad and shoos him off and says he doesn't pay him for hugs. He's gonna have to have a meeting with Reesemart HR now and Ethans all nooo, human resources, nooo! Back in the ring IED has Mariah up in the air about to hit some sort of finishing maneuver! Dot breaks a potted plant over Eleanors head causing her to drop to the mat! Mariah hurls Victoria into a ring post! Mariah and Dot hit their finishing moves on Victoria and hook the leg! Both of them piling atop her! WE HAVE NEW GOREHOUNDS CHAMPS!

WINNER: Mariah Kennedy and Dot.

Reese is on the outside screaming at Ethan saying look what he'd allowed to happen! The championships had almost been theirs and then THIS happened!

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "QT... Christmas Reese, whatever his name is, sure is an angry one, huh?"

COREY WELDMAN: "He feels it was stolen from him, Andrew. He had almost been a champion here in the Maimstream and now look?!"

Back in the ring, the new champions celebrate with their gold as they climb on the turnbuckles and show off the belts to end the match.

Corey sat in horror as he looked at a screen and saw all of his bank accounts were at zero. What in the hell was he going to do?

STEPHIE RAYGE: "Dang."

PRUDENCE: "Double dang."

Corey glanced at them both and flailed his arms.

COREY MAIM: "Don't dang me right now! This is serious! I don't have anything to pay anyone, all the checks are gonna bounce."

Both of them shrugged and wandered off as Corey began to think. He had to run. He could take off, become Dorothy by putting on a wig and live with some old broads. It was perfect. Then a phone rang...

COREY MAIM: "AHHH!"

VOICE: "Shut up you idiot, I'm going to offer you a deal, I will back you as far as paying for your show, and in return..."

COREY MAIM: "I send you nudes, got it."

VOICE: "Everyone's seen you naked. I could say the same about me. But - no, I'll contact you at a later date..."

Before he could say anything else, he felt the cold stare of Dove Van Damme glancing at him. His pecker stiffened as he turned around.

DOVE VAN DAMME: "Do you have my money?"

He checked and... it turned out maybe he could afford this whole thing after all, then he nodded.

COREY MAIM: "I think I just might."

DOVE VAN DAMME: "Good because the owners of the venue are pretty mad your check hasn't cleared too... pay me first and I'll distract them."

He walked over and nodded, high fiving her.

COREY MAIM: "Welcome back to the team. I needed you to handle all that anyway, when I handle things it can be... violent."

Dove nodded as she walked off, and out of the corner of his eye, Corey saw a shadowy figure following after her.

COREY MAIM: "Dove? Oh... I'm sure it'll be fine."

We go to the backstage area where Dash Dawkins is standing by after refusing to participate in the earlier battle royal.

DASH DAWKINS: "My name is Dash Dawkins and I am too good for deathmatch wrestling. I'm too good for hardcore. I'm just too good. All these rednecks in the audience cheering on someone like Matt 'Jethro' King. I mean Deathrow, but you'd think 'Jethro' given his lack of teeth. In fact, it runs in the family I'm sure because I saw the mans mother out in the parking lot giving gumjobs to the truckers that got the arena here..."

Before he could say anything else, we see the Death Merchants, Matt King and Santana Johnson standing by glaring at him. Before anything else could be said, several people stepped out dressed in security guard outfits in front of Dash.

MATT 'DEATHROW' KING: "The fuck did you say?"

SANTANA JOHNSON: "THIS MOTHERFUCKERR INSULTED YO MAMA. IF THAT WAS MY MAMA I'D KILL A BITCH."

DASH DAWKINS: "That's the problem, right there, neither of you could wrestle your way out of a paper bag so you have to resort to something lesser. But anyone can do your style, ANYONE."

MATT 'DEATHROW' KING: "Then fight me motherfucker, if anyone can do it."

DASH DAWKINS: "You'd like that, wouldn't you?! For someone like me to go down to your level."

SANTANA JOHNSON: "HIS GIRLFRIEND THE ONE WITH THE BALLS."

DASH DAWKINS: "You know what? You want it so bad. Fine! Next Maimstream, I want Matt 'Deathrow' King! Maybe I'll come for both of the Toothless Terrors and get your ass next, Santana!"

Before anything else could happen, Matt and Santana began fighting off the security in an attempt to give Dawkins a taste. Dawkins hurries down the hall, heading into the trainers room to check on the new Gore Whore Champion... and making sure to barricade the door after his mouth had gotten him into trouble.

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "What a main event we have in store for you tonight, as Tommy Knox and Kowloon Zombie go one on one for the Splatterpunk Championship."

COREY WELDMAN: "There's a lot of history here, and you can't get into it without acknowledging the longevity of the Zombie Clan in this business."

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "I've seen them wrestle a lot over the years and they have many greats - the great Detroit Zombie for instance. Kowloons brother - Marvin."

COREY WELDMAN: "I think your notes got hacked."

AUSTYN MAY: "The following contest is your main event of the evening and is for the Splatterpunk Championship! They will fight until we're kicked out of the building and then some if need be... and it will be contested under Maimstream rules!"

Kowloon Zombie vs. Tommy Knox
Splatterpunk Championship
Maimstream Rules

In the year 2021, Tommy Knox and Kowloon Zombie entered a ring. Little did they know they would spend a lifetime there. The match started out your typical way, with Tommy Knox bringing a fork into the ring and trying to fuck up Kowloon's pretty face. Typical stuff really. Classic catch as catch can wrestling. But Zombie powered out of it, because Zombie was one tough motherfucker and took control.

Zombie was hesitant to use the hardcore stylings, as he wanted to bring Maimstream into the mainstream (try saying that five times fast). The thing was, neither could gain the upper hand throughout. Both of them went back and forth as the arenas owners came in trying to usher people out. The two of them still kept fighting. They carried on while Dove Van Damme was nearby, trying to quell the concerns of the arena owners that Corey would get them their pay...

Twenty years later - Kowloon Zombie and Tommy Knox were still fighting. Calls from Tommy's woman had gone ignored, he was a terrible father to those kids, all because he was locked in a war with Zombie that had spanned the ages. Neither man had any quit, but after Zombie drove Tommy into the mat at one point, Zombie went to get up and his back ached from an earlier thumb tack spot that had since healed up.

Tommy tried to get up but the knife wounds in his back still felt as fresh as they were when Zombie had given them to him years ago in this same match. Both men laid in the ring, contemplating life and death.

KOWLOON ZOMBIE: "We've wasted our entire lives on this, and yet still, I will not quit, we will fight forever."

The robotic referee that had long since replaced the several dead referees in the corner moved back and forth in the corner of the ring.

TOMMY KNOX: "I just wanted a job to support my kids, man."

Both men let out a laugh at this, their dedication to this match having tied them together in this odd form of rivalry and sweet sweet man love.

KOWLOON ZOMBIE: "I suppose we must continue."

TOMMY KNOX: "We can't motherfuckin' stop now, dipshit."

SPECIAL CINEMATIC FUCKERY MATCH: THE BATTLE FOR THE MAGIC MAYONNAISE JAR.
PARTICIPANTS: Alexander Church, Matthias Graeme, Wilbur, Noelle Laurent, Matt 'Deathrow' King, Santana Johnson, Dexter Jacobs, Jimmy Pridmore, Johnny Violence, Rotgut, Switchblxde, Wendy Wynne, Scott Dunn, Bear McGraw, Claire Lichfield.

Back in the original timeline, we are greeted to the beginnings of the cinematic fuckery match! Where all of these individuals do battle for the magic mayonnaise jar. The match started on the grounds of Corey Maims house, which seemed to be a ran down home akin to something out of Resident Evil 7. Early on, Bear McGraw was taking people out on a horse he'd brought here for some reason, trampling people, riding past them and taking them out with a club and so on!

The first people to manage to make their way to the home were Noelle Laurent, Wendy Wynne, Claire Lichfield and a slow trickle of people from there. The home was already a mess but by the time these people tore it up, it was in more horrific of a shape. Jimmy Pridmore makes it into a shed and through a wall comes Rotgut riding a lawnmower! Pridmore narrowly crawls out of the way of the lawnmower as Rotgut eventually arrives to the house.

Alexander Church had a easier time getting to the house, by avoiding all the crazy people. He just sort of ducked behind some bushes and would run over when it was clear. He was like Agent 47 or something, infiltrating, finding the easiest path with the least resistance. He sees Matthias Graeme making his way up a ladder to get in to a second floor window and Church turns the ladder over, causing Matthias to fall from the second story window!

The countdown to people getting into the house was commencing, whomever was left outside would be eliminated! Noelle Laurent, Wendy Wynne, Alexander Church, Claire Lichfield, Rotgut and Jimmy Pridmore had all made it in! MDK and Santana Johnson were outside smoking and drinking and didn't seem too worried. Dexter Jacobs and Wilbur were fighting on the balcony, somehow having climbed up there... Switchblxde was on the room and managed to find a rotten part of it and slips in! Five, four, three, two... ONE. Both men dive in as well as Bear McGraw crashing through a wall on his horse! Scott Dunn would also be seen falling through a window and hitting into some sort of gas valve, which seemingly causes a gas leak!

ELIMINATED: Santana Johnson, Matt 'Deathrow' King, Matthias Graeme, Johnny Violence.

Santana and Matt did not give a fuuuuuuuck. All of the people in the house now consisting of Dexter Jacobs, Noelle Laurent, Claire Lichfield, Bear McGraw, Scott Dunn, Rotgut, Wendy Wynne, Switchblxde, Jimmy Pridmore, Alexander Church, Wilbur and that's it were a;; fighting slash tearing down the house as the gas leak continued to grow. Scott Dunn would tackle Bear McGraw off his horse and drive him through several walls before throwing him down a flight of stairs into the basement.

Rotgut would appear and begin stabbing the horse, cutting it open and beginning to pull out its entrails. The horse screamed in agony as Rotgut stuffed his way inside of the horse and began to lay in wait. Bear McGraw fell to the bottom of the damp basement when he tried to pull himself up, reaching up to pull a lightswitch, a bulb came on over head as several mannequins in ladies dresses sat in the basement with faces painted on them.

Bear began to move through this place, searching, and then he found it. The jar of [redacted]! All he had to do was get out of the building now! He went for the stairs only for Scott Dunn to leap down them and drive him into the ground with his bulky bulkitude. Bear would manage to get away briefly only for Dunn to come running at him and drive him through the stairway! Switchblxde was going through a room only to be caught in a bear trap which incapacitates him!

Bear laid there motionless as Dunn went to pick him up and finish the job. Bear grasping the jar when Scott lifts him up. Bear manages to grab hold of the door above and pull himself up, while Dunn is trapped in the basement pit with the mannequins, all of which begin moving on their own, heads turning at Scott.

SCOTT DUNN: "... What the..."

Bear is making his way back past his horse, only to see it begin to move after having been gutted. Suddenly Rotgut jumps out and begins to drag him into the guts of the horse with him. Bear is fighting, trying to hit him, drops the jar and nearby Claire Lichfield looks on in horror and takes the jar. She soon wanders back through the house, seeing the back door is blocked, she diverts through the kitchen and Noelle Laurent just bonks the shit out of her with a frying pan. Noelle tries to get away with the jar but Claire trips her up!

Claire slams Noelles head over the counter and starts trying to put her head in the microphone, slamming the door on it until she eventually gives up. Dexter Jacobs bowls through both of then with a double clothesline, then snaps a chair over Noelle's back before lifting Claire up and putting her through the kitchen table. He makes way for the jar only for Pridmore to tackle him into the sink, where they fall through rotten wood and into a den of rats. The rats are attacking them! The rats have entered the match!

Wendy Wynne comes out of a nearby bathroom with several rolls of toilet paper in hand and captures the jar, immediately going for the door! Wilbur comes around the corner from his own search for the jar and sees her, driving her up against the wall and slamming her head against it. He pulls down a painting from the wall and slams it over her head repeatedly, the gas leak starting to get stronger though as most people in the place are starting to get sick.

Some people pass out and lose consciousness, while Alexander Church is just strolling around. He finds Wilbur crawling towards the door, somehow having inhaled less gas than Wilbur. Wilbur fades and Alexander picks up the jar.

ALEXANDER CHURCH: "Huh neat."

Then he slowly walks through the door and the match has been dubbed by officials to finally be over.

WINNER: Alexander Church.

Alexander walks away from the house when suddenly it explodes! Everyone was in there! Alexander looks back and shrugs as Corey Maim appears.

COREY MAIM: "... shit the meth lab! Or many other things I had in there. Fuck. I don't have insurance."

Corey yelled out at the remains.

COREY MAIM: "Are you guys dead? Don't be dead."

Several wrestlers had been propelled from the exploding home and were fine, just a bit burned. Oh well.

We return to 2021 - a timewarp had opened in the arena after both Tommy Knox and Kowloon Zombie had disappeared. But they returned, the same age as when they'd left but it was as if they'd lived several lifetimes. They'd loved, and they'd lost, together. Tommy's children had graduated school while they wrestled that match. They'd missed every waking moment of their families lives, and you could see that sorrow within them.

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "I don't even know what's happened here."

COREY WELDMAN: "Same."

Tommy has Kowloon on the ropes when he briefly thinks of the children he both has and doesn't have, but he also thinks of the money. Both men have been neck at neck for the centuries they've fought. But out of nowhere, Kowloon Zombie hits his finishing move who's name I lost because he sent me his stats on another account! Kowloon goes for the pin but Tommy kicks out!

Both men are dying from this fight, they've killed eachother for ages. Tommy clubbing blows him upside the head repeatedly, busting Kowloon open with the sheer ferocity of his strikes. Then Tommy hits his finishing move 1... 2... 3... NO!

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "How is Kowloon still in this?"

Tommy yells why won't you die as he drags him out of the ring and begins to move up the stage with him. Tommy goes to powerbomb or something Kowloon off the stage, but Kowloon slips off him and drives him off the stage with him! BOTH MEN GO THROUGH THE TABLES AND ELECTRIC DOOHICKEYS THAT ARE PILED THERE FOR SOME REASON AHHH. ZAP ZAP BZZT. THOSE ARE SOUNDS ELECTRIC THINGS MAKE.

Zombie smells like cooked dead flesh or something because he's a zombie so there's this awful stench in here and Tommy is like I just wanna be a dad man as he blankly stares up at the sky all concussed. Kowloon limply drapes his arm over Tommy..

1.. 2.. 3.

AUSTYN MAY: "And here is your winner and the NEW Splatterpunk Champion... KOWLOON ZOMBIE."

We see the general manager/authority of Maimstream, Dove Van Damme who got paid present the championship to Kowloon. She congratulates him and raises his arm as the crowd of at least 100 people goes fuckin nuts.

COREY WELDMAN: "Millions of years have passed since the beginning of this match, every possible outcome across several timelines but here in this one, Kowloon Zombie defeated Tommy Knox but I can tell, their destinies are intertwined."

ANDREW MCALLISTER: "I don't know about all of that crap, but, this has been Maimstream, we've had a hell of a show and we'll see you guys next time... with our next big event coming... ?"

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